I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
