how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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