he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
