I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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