i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
