True but thats because hes a fetus.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Randomize
