office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
That accounts for only three of the penises
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
