I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
