I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
