Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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