So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
