he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
