All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
