It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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