who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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