; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
