On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
