i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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