Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
