So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
this is an emotional support booty call
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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