My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
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