Me. At least after what I've been through.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
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