nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Randomize
