Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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