i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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