coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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