I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
