you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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