i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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