Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
