I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
is it fun? or sober?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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