he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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