somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
