It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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