Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
