he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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