I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Randomize