Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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