Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
