in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
