: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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