The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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