ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
