hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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