Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Pants are for mortals
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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