please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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