So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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