he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
