Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
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