I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize