my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Randomize
