so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
